How time flies! J is now 6 months old, I've been so busy I haven't had a chance to post. It's definitely been an experience to say the least. Things got pretty tough about a month after J was born. S was fine at first, but started having issues adjusting to his new baby brother. Combine this with the holiday season, and poor S was really out of sorts. He gets weirded out and overwhelmed by new or different situations (such as parties with a lot of people, opening Christmas gifts, etc) He usually reacts by acting out or getting really hyperactive. Well, he acted out for about 2 months straight. I don't even have any pictures from Christmas, because he opened one gift, then started running around the tree kicking everything. It was really upsetting for both of us - what happened to our sweet little boy? Luckily, things calmed down after the holidays and now he adores his little brother. He's going to be 3 this summer (!!!) He's a wonderful kid, very bright and happy. The child care situation has been a challenge, more on that in another post.
J is doing great as well. He is 6 1/2 months old and developing wonderfully. He's a very happy, smiley and easygoing baby. He sleeps pretty well - he doesn't nap very much but tends to sleep from 7:30p - 5:30a without waking up. He's much easier than S was, maybe because we're a little wiser!
I had a rough time of it as well. Starting shortly after J was born, I would have days where I felt absolutely horrid. Just in a terrible mood and really feeling like I couldn't cope. Picking fights with the Bunny, yelling at S, just feeling like crap. Horrible intrusive negative thoughts - nothing about harming the baby or myself but lots of "you're a lousy mom," "the boys deserve better," etc. I had major issues with my milk supply and had to start supplementing when J was a few weeks old, this made me feel like a failure. It got worse when I went back to work full-time in January. To add to the mix, my law firm bank accounts got audited (something that happens to every NJ attorney eventually) and that caused me so much stress that I couldn't eat or sleep. I lost about 10 lbs in 3 weeks and my milk started drying up. Finally in early February, a colleague convinced me to talk to my OB about it - he diagnosed me with PPD. He put me on 50mg zoloft and I finally started feeling better after about 3 weeks on the medication. I'm off the meds now, exercising and feeling 100% better. Looking back, I realize how bad it was.
I won't lie, having two children in diapers is challenging to say the least. It's very hard on us and our marriage, but we've gotten into a routine and now we have wonderful in-home childcare. Looking forward to a fun summer with our boys!
Monday, May 4, 2015
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
Birth story
As I write this, J is 5 weeks old. He is a dream baby, very relaxed and easygoing. He was slow to gain weight at first, but as of this week he is 9 lb. He has started smiling! It is a lot easier than I expected with a second baby, especially because I'm not as anxious as before. He's just kind of joined our household and our routine, we've managed to get out more and do fun stuff with S. Here's the long-awaited birth story!
At 4:15 AM, I woke with cramping. I kind of had a feeling that things may be
starting. I tossed and turned for
awhile, trying to get back to sleep.
Finally got up at 5AM. As soon as
I went into the bathroom, my water broke.
It surprised me and I cursed and turned on the bathroom light, waking up the Bunny. I told him to go back to sleep.
I went downstairs, called my mom to come over, drank a cup
of tea and ate some cereal. I was having
very minor contractions every 10 mins or so.
I called the doc and they told me to wait 4 hours to see if contractions
start, if they don’t get going at least 5 minutes apart to call at 9AM.
S woke at 6:30 and we went through his usual morning
routine. My mom arrived and S was
very suspicious. He just wanted to
snuggle next to me, I think he knew what was coming, though I didn’t tell him I
was having the baby that day.
The Bunny took S to daycare and we got our things together
for the hospital. It was a beautiful,
sunny morning and unseasonably warm. At
9:30 I called the doctor and was told to go to the hospital.
We arrived at the hospital and were checked in. The Bunny started getting woozy and had to wait
in the waiting area. I was only 1 cm
dilated. The triage nurse, when she
found out I was an immigration lawyer, went on a crazy tirade about “anchor
babies” and how people are coming over from the Middle East to have babies
here. Totally nuts and a really
inappropriate conversation to have with a patient! The student nurse and I rolled our eyes at
each other.
I was sent up to a L&D room and met my nurse, who was
FANTASTIC. I was given half a cytotec to
get the contractions going, they got going pretty quickly. I called my sister to come to the hospital
later, I had a feeling I would need her there if the Bunny got woozy again. The contractions got going about every 3
minutes. They brought in a rocking chair
and I rocked through the contractions for about 2 hours.
The doctor was MIA when they wanted to check me, as she was
for most of my labor. Eventually another
doc checked me and I was at about 3 1/2 cm.
They offered an epidural but I wanted to wait until I was at least 5
cm. However, I was in a lot of pain, so
I said I’d get it in an hour.
My sister arrived just as they were about to put in the
epidural. What an ordeal. The doc inserted the catheter but something
wasn’t right with it because I felt a strong jolt in my left leg when she moved
it. She had to remove it and start over,
TWICE! Finally on the third attempt, she
called in another anesthesiologist to check it.
It was in the space, but just barely.
It was very hard to sit in that position for over 30 minutes, my neck
was killing me. She felt horrible about
it. My legs were starting to get numb,
so I took it as a good sign.
I had pain relief for about an hour, then started feeling
the contractions again, though not at bad as before. However, I could feel when the nurse checked
me. Another doc came and gave me an
extra shot of medication through the epidural catheter, that helped for
awhile.
At 5:40, the doc ordered that I be put on Pitocin. This ticked me off, because she never came to
ask me if that’s what I wanted or discussed it with me at all. She was obviously in a big hurry for me to
deliver. She even called the nurse to
make sure that she started it. I
complained to the nurse about it and she just gave me the smallest dose
possible.
Around 6PM, they checked me and I was at 6cm. I was really disappointed, I thought I would
have been further along. I was in quite
a lot of pain at this point. The nurse
recommended that we use the “peanut ball” to put me on my side and speed things
along. It’s a peanut-shaped exercise
ball that they put between your legs.
The minute I turned over, I suddenly felt an incredible pain and
pressure. It felt like the baby was
going to come out of my butt. The nurse
said I’d have to endure it, but after laying on my side for a few minutes I was
having a strong urge to push. My sister
ran for the nurse, they checked me and I was complete. I went from 6 to complete in about 15
minutes! The MIA doc came and had me
push once, then she disappeared again. She had another patient about to deliver
and she had to check on her. I had to
breathe through 2 contractions, which was agony. Thankfully, the doc came back and suited up
for the delivery.
I pushed for about 20 minutes, through about 8
contractions. I can’t really describe
it, other than to say I was in pure agony.
Hats off to moms who go through natural childbirth, I would never be able
to do it again. Finally, at 7PM, J came
out, with one hand next to his head and his cord wrapped around his neck! He was totally fine, though, and I got to
hold him for a few seconds when he came out.
I was shocked to see what dark hair he has and commented on how blue he
looked (he hadn’t yet taken a breath). I
had a second degree tear which was stitched up.
J scored 8/9 on his apgars. My
sister was super excited to have witnessed the birth.
S visited the next day.
He acted very oddly toward me at the hospital, he wouldn’t come over
near the bed or look at the baby. I
think it freaked him out a little bit that I was in bed in the hospital, he
didn’t understand what was going on.
Thank goodness my mom brought him a helium “big brother” balloon, which
he played with and then she read him a book to break the ice.
Saturday, October 18, 2014
Here he is!
As I'm sure you guessed, he's here! Baby JJ was born on Tuesday, October 14 at 7pm. He was 7lb 4oz, 20.5 inches and is perfect. I'll post the birth story soon, here's the crib notes version: water broke at 5AM, admitted to hospital at 9:30 AM 1 cm dilated, epidural at 4 cm, epidural failed, pitocin at 6cm, went from 6 cm to complete in 10 mins, he was born in about 8 agonizing pushes. He's very relaxed, sleepy and a great nurser so far. Here's a pic!
Friday, October 10, 2014
39.9 weeks, still nothing!
Here I am, 2 days away from my due date and still nothing! Thankfully the headache went away, but the days are dragging on. I had a doc appt on Monday and he said I was barely 1 cm. I worked almost the whole week just to keep busy, luckily I can come and go as I please. I stayed home today, though, cause I didn't sleep well last night. I've had cramping and the odd contraction all week, but every time I think something is starting, it stops. My MIL is coming for the weekend, fingers crossed that he comes soon!
Saturday, October 4, 2014
39 weeks = misery
I'll be 39 weeks on Monday. Things have taken a turn for the miserable. Unlike when I was at this stage with S, I am having super uncomfortable cramping and intermittent contractions if I walk around too much. I think it's because the baby is super low, so when he is moving around his head is right against my cervix. To make matters worse, I have had a splitting headache for 5 days. I actually went to the OB about it on Wednesday, because I haven't had a headache like this in a long time. But my blood pressure is normal and I'm having no other symptoms, so they're just calling it a migraine. Nearly a week has gone by and my head is still splitting. I have a high pain tolerance normally, but it is nearly unbearable and tylenol barely puts a dent in it. I called the OB today to see what he suggests, so he called me in a prescription for tylenol with codeine. I go to pick it up this afternoon and the pharmacy (Schmalgreens) refuses to fill it, saying that I should not be taking codeine if pregnant, even though my OB is the one who called it in. I drove home in tears. Ugh, I'm just praying that I go into labor soon, I can't take any more! On the positive side, I'm pretty much wrapped up at work and don't have to go in anymore if I don't feel like it.
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
37 weeks
3 weeks to go! I'm really in the home stretch now. I had my Group B Strep test last week (negative, thank goodness) and did an internal exam since I was already undressed. I'm a fingertip dilated and 50% effaced! There's not much going on down there, I'm only having BH contractions a few times a day, a little bit of cramping and pressure, but I think he'll stay put for at least another 2 weeks. I'm having non-stress tests at my weekly OB appointment but they have been fine so far. I'm still frantically trying to get my work done, I'll feel much better once I wrap everything up. Unfortunately I've had some angry and complaining clients over the last few weeks but I'm doing my best and realize I can't please everyone. I'll update again next week. Fingers crossed that he comes a little early!
Sunday, September 7, 2014
35 weeks
Still hanging in here at 35 weeks! Just a few weeks till October 12. I'm hoping I'll go a little early this time. It's more difficult at this stage for me than it was with Baby S. The baby's head is really low, and when he moves it around it feels really uncomfortable against my cervix and also like I might pee my pants! I'm as big now as I was when S was born, I can't even imagine how I'll be in 5 weeks. I'm running out of maternity clothes that fit. I'm still working a lot (though I have blocked out some "work at home" days so that I can rest). The Bunny is helping me more with S and around the house, it's getting too hard to wrangle our very energetic 2 year old. We're pretty much ready for the arrival of (as yet nameless) baby brother, I brought up the infant clothes, bassinet, etc. and made some cute curtains for his room. A friend will lend us her crib when her toddler is done with it, until then he'll sleep in the bassinet or rock n' play. S is still in his crib, we're keeping him in it till he's ready to go to his "big boy" bed, which is currently in baby brother's room. I'll try to update more often from here on out!
Sunday, August 3, 2014
2!!!
Thursday, July 17, 2014
27 weeks
I can't believe that I'm officially in the third trimester! Things are going fine so far, but I won't lie, it's getting harder. I've gained over 25 lbs so far and starting to waddle. The belly is much bigger this time and the baby is kicking like crazy. (which I love) The heartburn isn't as bad as last pregnancy but I still have to take antacids every day. Thank goodness I haven't had the tormenting rib pain that I had with the last pregnancy, but I get an ache every one in a while. Work is crazy as I attempt to get as much work done as possible before maternity leave in October. The clock is ticking! I'm going to take a longer leave this time, partly due to the holidays, so I need to have all my ducks in a row before I go. Running a law practice while having children is no joke! Luckily I have great staff and some great attorney friends who will cover for me while I'm out. I'm starting to plan baby brother's nursery, I will convert one of the guest bedrooms into his room. I'm making curtains for S's room (he has two big windows, so gets a lot of sun and his room tends to get very hot), as soon as I'm done I will start on baby brother's room. We can't for the life of us agree on a name for this one, we've just been calling him "baby brother!"
Speaking of S, he is turning 2 in less than 2 weeks!! I can't believe my baby is turning 2. He is doing great, talking up a storm and enjoying playing outside this summer. He's a delightful child and while we're starting to see a little bit of terrible two behavior, he is easygoing and cheerful for the most part. I'll post a pic soon. Thanks for reading!
Speaking of S, he is turning 2 in less than 2 weeks!! I can't believe my baby is turning 2. He is doing great, talking up a storm and enjoying playing outside this summer. He's a delightful child and while we're starting to see a little bit of terrible two behavior, he is easygoing and cheerful for the most part. I'll post a pic soon. Thanks for reading!
Thursday, June 5, 2014
21 weeks
All is going well with the pregnancy! I had my 20 week ultrasound this morning and baby is looking great. Funnily enough, my 20 week ultrasound was supposed to be two weeks ago, they canceled it the morning of! I was super disappointed but made them tell me the gender, I was dying to know. We're having another BOY! He looks great (as the MFM doc put it - he's "disgustingly healthy.") This pregnancy is going easier than the last one. I'm a lot bigger than I was at this stage last time, but the heartburn and rib pain isn't as severe as it was last time. I've been feeling lots of movement since about 14 weeks. I'm talking to S about the new baby, and he likes to say "baby brudder" but I don't think he will understand until we bring the baby home. We're headed to Kansas City tomorrow for a week - our first vacation in a long time! And probably the last before new baby comes. I'll try to update a little more often, but can't make any guarantees. Happy summer!
Friday, April 11, 2014
13 weeks
So, so sorry for not updating in so long! I'm very embarrassed not to have updated in nearly a month. But no news is good news, because everything is going very well so far. I'm 13 weeks and officially in the 2nd trimester! My 12-week ultrasound was last week and everything looks normal. The nuchal test was normal and I also had the cell-free DNA screen last week. That was normal as well! I was going to find out the gender, which they determine with the cell-free DNA test, but the Bunny wants to wait until the 20-week ultrasound. It's torture for me to wait, but Bunny doesn't ask for much, so I'll indulge him. I started feeling the baby move about a week ago, believe it or not! It seems really early but it's definitely the baby. I'm feeling better and trying to enjoy the "easy" part of pregnancy. Thank goodness, no heartburn or rib pain yet that plagued me last pregnancy. I'll try to update more often, thanks for reading.
Wednesday, March 12, 2014
Relief
I had an ultrasound this morning and all is well. The yolk sac measured at 3 mm. It appears that the ultrasound nurse misread or mis-measured the yolk sac last week, so it was probably never enlarged in the first place. The baby is looking great, heartbeat is great and there are no concerns. I'm very relieved but also a little irritated at the nurse's error. (My pregnancy nurse shares that sentiment) I'll have my first OB appt tomorrow morning and will also go for that blood DNA test. I was going to cancel it but I figure I may as well get it for my peace of mind.
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Thanks and another update
Thank you guys for your nice comments, they mean a lot. I did a lot of googling last night and you know how that goes - lots of bad and good stories. I read a few scientific studies about the yolk sac and the newest ones show mixed results for a viable pregnancy, just as the doctor said. I
made a lot of calls this morning and won't be able to get into MFM till
late next week at the soonest. MFM only schedules patients with a referral from the OB. I just switched OBs and they can't order MFM
tests until they have seen me, they moved my appointment up from the 17th to the
13th. My RE can't send me to MFM because they are not considered to be
OBs. (damned insurance companies) All the doctors agree I should
get that newfangled "cell free" DNA testing done, where they take fetal
DNA from the mother's blood and test it for chromosomal issues and
gender. Neither my RE nor my OB does it, so I'll do it through a
private lab and pay out of pocket. That way, if the results come up normal I
can opt out of CVS. If they're abnormal, I'll have time to do the CVS or other testing. It will be done around 10 weeks, then I'll go from there. I have an ultrasound next Wednesday to see what's going on with
the yolk sac. I'm going to try and put it out of my mind until then.
Wednesday, March 5, 2014
A complication
I had an ultrasound today there's a potential issue with the pregnancy.
Good news: baby is measuring perfect for 8 weeks and the heartbeat is good. Bad
news: I have a pretty big sub-chorionic hematoma which wasn't there 2
weeks ago and my yolk sac is abnormally large (measuring 8, anything
above a 6 is abnormal). However, I'm not bleeding or spotting. My usually very
chill RE called me TWICE today (left a voicemail, then called an hour
later and spoke to me) to tell me that I may want to get to a maternal
fetal medicine doc ASAP. He didn't say anything about the SCH, but says
the enlarged yolk sac could be a sign of chromosomal abnormalities. He
says it may be nothing, but I may need to get CVS testing to rule out
any chromosomal issues. Ugh, not what I was expecting at all. I'm
going to be a bundle of nerves until I can see a specialist, I'm going to try and get in ASAP.
Thursday, February 27, 2014
Overdue update
Oops, sorry I've been so neglectful of the blog! I'm on so many buddy groups and forums that I keep forgetting to update here. So, I'm 7 weeks 3 days pregnant as of today. I had an ultrasound about a week ago and saw the little heartbeat! It was such a relief. Everything is measuring fine and looking good. I had a blood draw today and will have an ultrasound next week. They are still doing betas, believe it or not, today I'm up to 65,002. I'm feeling pretty good. I've had some bad bouts of nausea, but I've felt fine over the last week. I've really "popped" this week (already!!??) and had to break out the maternity pants. I've told some people, but I'll wait until 12 weeks to tell the extended family.
I tried to make an appointment with my old OB (from the last pregnancy), but was put on hold for over 5 minutes (15 minutes, the first time) each time I tried to call. I was treated rudely when I tried to speak to someone, so I decided to switch OBs. I really loved the doctor who delivered S (see birth story), so I decided to go with his practice, even though it's about 30 minutes from my house. I'm a little worried about the distance, but I guess it will be worth it if it's a great practice.
I tried to make an appointment with my old OB (from the last pregnancy), but was put on hold for over 5 minutes (15 minutes, the first time) each time I tried to call. I was treated rudely when I tried to speak to someone, so I decided to switch OBs. I really loved the doctor who delivered S (see birth story), so I decided to go with his practice, even though it's about 30 minutes from my house. I'm a little worried about the distance, but I guess it will be worth it if it's a great practice.
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Ultrasound
My first ultrasound was this afternoon, I'm 5w2d today. Just one sac (thank goodness! No offense to my dear moms of multiples). HCG shot up from 1211 to 3297 in 48 hours. They couldn't see the yolk sac but hopefully next time. I'm still not feeling many symptoms other than being extra tired and not wanting to drink coffee (that makes it easier to give up the caffeine, I'm a bit of a coffee addict). I'm still not fully excited about this pregnancy, I need to see the heartbeat to be a little reassured.
Monday, February 10, 2014
Thursday, February 6, 2014
Beta #2
Beta #2 was 230. It didn't double but the doctor is happy with it, they consider at least a 60% rise in 48 hours to be normal. They actually called my numbers "excellent" which surprised me. I'll go for a third beta on Monday. I think they need it to be over 1000 before they'll schedule an ultrasound. The somewhat slow rise is making me a little anxious, but I'll take my docs at their word and try not to worry about it.
Symptom-wise, there's not much going on. I have had a LOT of cramping this time around. I cramped pretty badly starting from transfer day through the middle of last week. I imagine it was implantation but it still made me nervous. No nausea or sore boobs yet (same as last pregnancy) but the bra is getting a little tight! The other weird thing that I suddenly remember from last pregnancy is that I was waking up spontaneously at about 5:30 AM every day. That is back, unfortunately. I'm also feeling anxious because I'm not supposed to lift anything over 15 lbs, but that is impossible due to my little boy. He's over 25 lbs and though I don't have to lift him or carry him as much as I used to, it's unavoidable (in and out of the high chair, car seat and crib, especially). I'm trying to get as much rest as possible, but it's impossible to really take it easy due to the little one. Not that I'm complaining, of course, but I hope I don't put my pregnancy at risk.
I also realize that I have never updated about baby S! He is now 18 months old. He walks, runs, and says over 50 words. He has been an absolute delight! He has a sunny, cheerful personality, is easy to please and has a funny sense of humor. He is staring to get a little more challenging at this age - he is starting to be a little defiant, have tantrums and test limits. It's all completely normal for a toddler but it gets tough to deal with sometimes. He's a great eater and sleeper (most of the time). He has been in daycare since he was 15 months old and he really enjoys it! (he was in a private home from 3 months - 15 months) We feel like we won the lottery with him and would be fine to have him as an only child, but we really want him to have a sibling. I think he'll make a great big brother!
Symptom-wise, there's not much going on. I have had a LOT of cramping this time around. I cramped pretty badly starting from transfer day through the middle of last week. I imagine it was implantation but it still made me nervous. No nausea or sore boobs yet (same as last pregnancy) but the bra is getting a little tight! The other weird thing that I suddenly remember from last pregnancy is that I was waking up spontaneously at about 5:30 AM every day. That is back, unfortunately. I'm also feeling anxious because I'm not supposed to lift anything over 15 lbs, but that is impossible due to my little boy. He's over 25 lbs and though I don't have to lift him or carry him as much as I used to, it's unavoidable (in and out of the high chair, car seat and crib, especially). I'm trying to get as much rest as possible, but it's impossible to really take it easy due to the little one. Not that I'm complaining, of course, but I hope I don't put my pregnancy at risk.
I also realize that I have never updated about baby S! He is now 18 months old. He walks, runs, and says over 50 words. He has been an absolute delight! He has a sunny, cheerful personality, is easy to please and has a funny sense of humor. He is staring to get a little more challenging at this age - he is starting to be a little defiant, have tantrums and test limits. It's all completely normal for a toddler but it gets tough to deal with sometimes. He's a great eater and sleeper (most of the time). He has been in daycare since he was 15 months old and he really enjoys it! (he was in a private home from 3 months - 15 months) We feel like we won the lottery with him and would be fine to have him as an only child, but we really want him to have a sibling. I think he'll make a great big brother!
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Beta #1
My beta was yesterday, sorry I forgot to post! I had my blood drawn at 8AM but didn't get the call until 4:30 PM. My number was 146 - a good start. Second beta will be tomorrow.
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Peestick report
Here's my long-overdue peestick report. This cycle, I didn't even try to resist testing early, so I tested every day starting on transfer day. I started out on the cheapie strips, then broke out the FRERs starting at 9DPO. Lines got lighter and lighter from 7DPO to 9DPO, then started darkening again at 10DPO. So, it's looking like I'm pregnant. At least for now! For those of you who love POAS pictures, my progression is below. My beta is on Tuesday morning.
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